But after a long day of work, I just want to sit down and kick my feet up. Well, I could do that and write, too, I guess, but I'm just not feeling very much in a creative mood at the moment. So I'm going to give you a poem I wrote about a year ago for a friend of mine after she miscarried.
And for those of you who have not read a lot of my poetry yet... yes, I did write it in first person. But no, it's not about me. But when I'm empathizing with someone, trying to share their feelings and perspective, I often jump into first person when writing their experiences. It just means that when I was writing the poem, I was trying to look through that person's eyes, feel with their heart, relive their painful memories with them.
18 weeks
The first six weeks
I didn't knowAnd in just twelve weeks
We've grown so close
That the thought
Of life without you
Leaves me now bereft
Just last week I saw you
Sucking your thumb
In a 3-D ultrasound
Just last week I began to feel you
As you moved around
And now I'm left with pain,
Pain
More pain flooding in
My empty arms
And empty belly
Are longing for you again
My abdomen is sore
My back aches quite a lot
But my grieving heart is broken
Because of where you are not
The drugs may dull the pain
But the heartache won't subside
How can I deal with the wounds on my soul
Since my baby died?
So sad, and so hard. I hope your friend got some counseling and some good deep soul therapy. It's this kind of woundedness that can cause people to loose their faith. God is good all the time, even when we don't understand.
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